


wedding crasher

by orphan_account



Category: Glee
Genre: Cotton-Candy Fluff, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-11
Updated: 2013-10-11
Packaged: 2017-12-28 09:27:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/990417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt crashes a wedding in righteous indignation. The results are unexpected. Also, Jeff is wily.</p>
            </blockquote>





	wedding crasher

**Author's Note:**

  * For [froggydarren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/froggydarren/gifts).



> written as a birthday present for Jen, but then it got long. So, a belated birthday present, then!

“Are you nervous?”

Kurt turned to his husband and smiled. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?”

Blaine smiled and twirled his ring, looking down. “I’m not. I’m too happy to be.”

“You’re adorable,” Kurt said in his ear, before drawing back and kissing his cheek. “Now, people, I think Blaine has something to say.”

 ***

It started with a misplaced text.

Looking back, it wasn’t really Sam’s fault. It was seven in the morning and he’d been up since four, trying to calm his best friend down, and the phones looked exactly alike (they even had the same wallpaper).

So when Jennifer (their boss at the bookshop) texted him asking why he was late, he texted back saying that he was getting married (on behalf of his best friend) when Nick handed him the phone.

He really didn’t notice that he’d texted Jeff instead, from Nick’s phone. Oh well.

 ***

“…seriously though, how _dare_ he!” Kurt fumed, as he stomped along the pavement. Behind him, Rachel followed nervously, with a teary-eyed Jeff in tow. Puck was holding his hand and following behind at a rapid pace.

“Kurt, we should think about this,” Rachel said in an urgent tone. “We don’t know for sure that Nick is actually running off to marry someone- he could be joking, or sleepy, or-”

“He can’t be, he can’t be,” Jeff sobbed hysterically, as Puck patted his head awkwardly (Jeff was around half-a-foot-taller than him).

“Doesn’t matter, we need an explanation,” Kurt said in a monotone. His scarf was fluttering in the wind and his hair was askew, but he didn’t seem to mind this time. “You all can wait outside, Jeff do you want to come in?”

“No- no, Kurt, his family doesn’t know about us yet…”

“Why you put up with him, I don’t know,” the brunet muttered to himself as they went on, turning the corner and coming in sight of a huge chapel. “Wait- they’re holding the wedding in a _chapel_? Is that even done?”

“It’s a Universal Unilateral-something church,” Puck offered. “I heard from Santana that they do this sort of thing.”

“Well, I’m going in,” Kurt said decisively, already taking rapid steps towards the place. Rachel just watched him go, unable to speak a word. “I think he’s…projecting a little,” he said hesitantly. “You know how Kurt is about this sort of thing- should we go in, Puck?”

“Nah, let him handle it.” Puck grinned. “Plus, imagine the entertainment factor if he interrupts the vows.”

The other two gaped at him, before Jeff’s phone rang. He looked down at his pocket and hesitantly took it out to see a text.  His eyes widened as he read it.

“Oh my god- Rachel we have to stop him!” He started running towards the chapel.

“What? Why?!!!” Rachel and Puck followed him. “What did you see?”

“It’s not Nick who’s getting married,” Jeff moaned, as they stopped because of the traffic. “Oh god, why did I let Kurt see that text?!”

“WHAT?!!!”

 ***

“I’m the planner, Mrs Duval wanted to see me,” Kurt informed the bored-looking security at the gate to the chapel lawn. The woman yawned in his face before letting him in.

The lawn itself was lovely, but the decorations were so tacky that Kurt had to snort. He strode in confidently, planning Nick’s demise. Jeff was always a little insecure about his boyfriend (given that the guy hadn’t even introduced him to his family after a year of dating) but Kurt had always thought that Nick really did love Jeff.

Until now, of course. Kurt was furious that anyone could take advantage of Jeff like that. Although, given the wedding planning abilities of these people, he could understand why Nick hadn’t wanted his family to meet someone as fabulous as Jeff.

“Little _rat_ , I’m going to kill him.”

Oh yes, Kurt was planning the demise of one Nicholas Duval, and it would be messy. Because first he’d start off with the one clichéd thing designed to stop any wedding.

He stepped into the chapel only to see two guys already there at the altar. Nick’s face was turned away- he looked _different_ \- what with the gelled hair and all. The other was taller with auburn hair (oh my god, they were in matching tuxes, how _gauche_ ) and seemed to be trying to meet his eyes.

Oh well. Time to put the plan into action.

“I can’t believe this- did our love mean nothing to you?!” he announced.

The two men turned, but Kurt was already in his element, having watched several soap operas with this particular trope. “I loved you so much, and you betrayed me! I’ve let you get away with so much in the past- how do you expect me to bear _this_?” Kurt kneeled on the floor (wincing internally because good god, his poor Vivienne Westwood trousers), putting his hand on his heart and closing his eyes in an expression of agony.

“Who the hell is this?” said an unfamiliar voice. Kurt’s eyes flew open and he looked up to see the other groom (he looked kind of like a meerkat. Kurt disliked him instantly) glaring down at him. He glared right back and begun his tirade. “I’m Kurt Hummel, and you better remember that before you…”

“Sebastian- don’t swear inside a church,” said a soft voice. Kurt turned his fake-teary eyes to Nick…

…only to see that it wasn’t Nick.

Instead, the most beautiful man he’d ever seen (and he saw models on a daily basis) stared down at him through honey-whiskey-moss colored eyes. Oh my god, I think I’m in love.

Wait.

Where the fuck was Nick?

Kurt felt a rising sense of dread as the boy grabbed his hand and helped him up, a slightly wild look on his face.

“It’s true,” he said, before anyone else could say anything else. “I’m engaged to him, Sebastian.”

“You are?” Kurt muttered to himself, eyes widening when he spotted Nick in the front pew, repeatedly face-palming himself.

“We’ve been over this, Blaine.”

The man (who was currently holding his hand tight and practically snuggling into his side, oh Gaga) was now glaring at the meerkat. “Yes, I needed to marry someone, you were the only one willing at that point. Not anymore.”

Kurt was beginning to catch on. “Um, Blaine…”

“My lovely fiancé- the _real_ one, has proven that he loves me more than you ever could.” He leant up. “And since he’s stepped forward, I see no reason why this sham of a wedding should go on.”

And with that, he turned and broke into a run, dragging Kurt behind him.

“What the hell?” Kurt hissed at the guy as they ran.

“We’ll talk later, fiancé of mine. Just let’s get out of here- I know a shortcut.”

So they ran, ignoring the commotion from the pews, and someone yelling- that had to be Meerkat-Face- and the flustered girls they came across and dodged before running again.

The entire time, Kurt felt like he was going in slow motion. As if they were meant to hold each other and run forever. Which wasn’t really romantic if you were in a dingy chapel but somehow felt…right.

They’d probably run exactly two minutes before they were outside on a different street- but Kurt was panting as they stepped out into the sunlight. “I hated those corridors,” Blaine muttered, before turning to Kurt shyly. “You probably think I’m going to punch you.”

“You should,” Kurt admitted. His hands were sweating, but the man only cocked his head and gave him a smile.

“I won’t,” he assured. “You saved me from some really nasty negotiations in there- so thank you.” He beamed, and Kurt swooned a little. “I’ve got to go now- it won’t be pretty if one of them find me here.” He hailed a cab and turned back to him as it stopped. “Thank you.”

Kurt sucked in a deep breath. Something was telling him not to let go- that if he let go now, he’d be missing out something.

“Why not?”

“What?”

“Why were you trapping yourself with- that?” He waved his hands in a slightly flaily motion towards the church.

Blaine stopped, biting his lip. “I kind of need my trust fund. And I can’t get to it unless I’m married.”

Oh. Ohh.

“How old are you?” Kurt asked, because the man looked so much younger now.

“Nineteen…” oh my _god_. “I need it for college, since my parents aren’t really funding my rents.”

Okay, Kurt. Take deep breaths. “You need a roommate?”

“Sort of. I work part-time, but it’s not enough for my apartment…”

“Live with me,” Kurt said abruptly. The man- boy’s eyes widened. “What?”

“My roommate is moving out next week- you can live with me until this blows over.”

Blaine smiled- a wide, goofy one that knocked the breath out of Kurt because holy shit it was adorable. “I might just take you up on that offer.”

 ***

“He picked up!!” Jeff told Rachel and Puck. “Hello?”

“Uh, Jeff?” Kurt’s voice came out tinny from the loudspeaker.

“Yes- oh my god, Kurt, I’m so sorry, I never meant to put you on the spot like that-!”

“It’s fine,” Kurt chuckled, making them all exchange puzzled glances. “Also, Jeff? Tell Rachel that I have a new roommate.”

 ***

Blaine went up on the podium and took a deep breath.

“Most of you don’t know this- but me and Kurt- we met right here. I took this man’s hand and we ran down that hallway. So it’s pretty much a sacred place for me- not just because it’s a church. It’s mostly because I met my soulmate here.”

“Kurt always tells me that he thought we ran in slow motion through the shortcut I’d found. I believe him- because I’ve always thought that it was destiny for us to meet here, and that we were meant to hold each other’s hands fearlessly and forever.”

“Corny, dude!” Puck catcalled, and everyone laughed. Blaine chuckled.

“It might be corny, but I think I fell in love with him right then. He was so easy to fall in love with- it was as natural as breathing.”

“Which is why I think that Nick and Jeff- who were the real reason we met, and the reason why we’re here today- will have a splendid married life, and make every single man and lady in here jealous of their very existence.” Blaine grinned suddenly. “Although, I must say it takes a lot of guts to challenge the standards of corniness me and Kurt have set.”

“Oh get down, you goof,” Kurt said affectionately, even as Sam yelled, “Hell yeah!” and everyone clapped. Blaine affected a swoon and jumped down into Kurt’s arms, nearly bringing them both to the floor. The music started back up, as Nick and Jeff moved through the crowd, being thumped on the back and hugged, while the rest of them moved to the dance floor.

“Happy roommate-anniversary, Mr. Anderson-Hummel,” Blaine murmured into his husband’s ear. Kurt grinned at him.

“You were the best roommate ever, even if you did leave your socks on the bed everytime.”

“You know you’d never have made a move otherwise.”

“You were so polite, how was I supposed to?”

“Which is why I needed some sort of UST for you to act on your feelings,” Blaine cooed. Kurt snickered. “Dork. Let’s get you home.”

“Aren’t we staying around to congratulate Niff?”

“Niff can wait,” Kurt winked at Nick over his shoulder. “They’re responsible for us getting together anyway.”

“Not really,” Blaine said, looking up at his husband’s (the word thrilled him even two years later) face. “We were always meant to be.”

Kurt giggled, swaying him to the beat. “Are you telling me you would have run away with me even if you were married? How scandalous of you.”

“I would have known not to get married,” Blaine argued. “We’d have met in Vegas, or Tennessee, or even Alabama. Or Antarctica. But we’d meet- and I’d choose you every time.”

Kurt smiled at him lovingly, hugging him as they went out. “Of course you would.”

 ***

Nick smiled at the couple (they still behaved like newlyweds!). “Jeff? I’ve got to tell you something.”

“What?” Jeff asked turning around to face his husband.

“Remember that text I sent you four years ago? The one which caused the fiasco?”

“Yeah?”

“I’ve no idea why…but I think I knew it would lead to this.”

Jeff rolled his eyes. Nick was so drunk. “Let’s get you to bed, mister.”

He was the only one who knew what had actually happened, of course.

 ***

“Nick? What the fuck do you mean, getting married?”

“Wha- oh, Jeff? It’s me, Sam. No, it’s not Nick, Blaine’s doing it. I have no idea why, man, he’s just getting married because he doesn’t have a roommate, it’s insane. I’m pretty sure I just heard him wailing about how he just wants someone else to pull him out of this mess…”

Jeff sat down, his face calculating. “Tell me more?”

 ***

The Start:

“K- Kurt? Nick sent me a text- he said he’s g-getting- married!” Jeff wailed, making everyone in the café stare at him. Kurt stood up. “What do you mean?!”

“He says I don’t love him enough…I just want to go in there and declare my love for him, I’m so scared Kurt!”

Puck  looked at Jeff quizzically. “That’s rather…dramatic.”

“It doesn’t matter!” Kurt declared. “I’m going after him!” He set down his tip and walked out, much to the bewilderment of the waitress who’d just appeared with his food.

Jeff smiled to himself as they followed him out. Awesome.

 ***

_…as if in every lifetime that you and I have ever lived, we’ve chosen to come back and fall in love with each other all over again, over and over._

_For all eternity._

**Author's Note:**

> comments are love~!


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